Avant garde, no?

Tested for your enjoyment

1. Go through MacDonald's drivethru in a trolley being pushed by a guy in a clown costume

2. Go into KFC to get a soft serve in a trolley being pushed by a guy in a clown costume (Maybe not a soft serve, they don't sell them anymore)

3. Get chased through Safeway while wearing a trenchcoat and slippers, by a guy in a white jacket shouting, "Come back, It's warm at home!", who is being chased by a guy in a clown costume.

4. Be a mime at coles.

5. Go into Horizon petrol station and get someone to call you.  Then answer using your shoe.

6. Fill backpack with fuzzy toys and rubber duckies and a bio-hazard suit, then drink non-alcoholic wine until a cop pulls you up.

7. Chain yourself to the walkway outside of coles until someone asks you what you're doing.  Try not to do the 'pelted with rubber duckies' bit that I did.

8. Take bag of rubber duckies into supermarket, go into dog-food aisle, then kick bag (causing squeaking noises), saying "Shut up, Spot!"

9. Jump into bushes at Civic Park

10. Light a sparkler bomb in the train-station at night

11. Mock the teeny-boppers on a Friday night

12. Call Pinkie's pizza and ask for a Wild Dog special (Rival pizza store)

13. Buffyfest!

14. Go skating at the roller-rink.  They have balls that you can throw at people.

15. Pretend to be doing a drug deal outside the post office

16. Dance along the main street, swinging around poles, jumping up onto benches, and clicking your heels. Try to avoid landing on any cars.

17. Carry a "The End is Near" sign.  Go up to someone and say, "Even nearer for you!"

18. Set up a 3-card monte game outside the Cinema

19. Go into Top Video (In the Link Arcade) and talk to Luke about horror movies.

20. Take old cheap wine bottles with talcum powder to the primary school so it looks like there's been a crack party. Watch for the angry letters in the next week's paper.

21. Put flyers advertising a new Satanic cult into people's letterboxes.

22. Cook pancakes on the barbecues at Civic Park at night.  Explain to the police that you're just cooking pancakes.

23. Go play on the big train in the park off Queen St.

24. Sit upside down on a park bench in the Main St. When someone asks why you're upside down, say, "What? You're the one who's upside down!"

25. Go to the annual fair and interview the stall owners.

26. Go into Maccas in your best dinner outfit and lay out a table for 2 (Table cloth, napkins, plates, knives, forks) then eat your meals with a knife and fork.

27. Follow someone in the supermarket, whenever they pick something up use a walkie-talkie and say, "subject has picked up butter, walnuts etc." If they ask you what you're doing, feign ignorance, then when they move on, radio through: "subject has made contact. Ending mission."

28. Find a penny, pick it up. All the day, you'll have good luck. (Finding money is fun anywhere)

29. Go into KFC and ask for napkins. Then start eating them.

30. Watch a movie. We have 4 screens at the cinema.

31. Go into Ellude (the clothing store with the big Kwality Kids Klothing sign) dressed as a klansman, take a small child and see if you can get a matching outfit for the kid. Man, that was fun..

32. Hop, skip, and jump along the sidewalk.

33. Go up to a stranger, and give them a hug, saying cryptically, "Well, it was nice knowing you."

34. Have a spam-fight!

35. Ask a McDonald's employee when did they sell their soul to the Devil.

36. Go to the "church" on Albert St. on a Sunday and explain the cold hard realities of life to the little cult kids.

37. Watch a brawl.

38. Watch the petrol-heads on Friday night. Then watch the petrol-heads suddenly turn into little old grannies when the cops show up.

39. Get a cap gun, and fire it in the alley near the Drive-Thru Bottle-O on an underage dance party night to scare all the drinking teeny-boppers out of their skins.

40. Engage in a little teenage alcoholism yourself.

41. Get M+Ms, throw them into the air and try to catch them with your mouth.

42. Go up to people who are smoking and ask them why insist on polluting the planet. When they tell you that their smoking is none of your business, say, "Smoking? That's not what I was talking about at all." and walk off.

43. Take a banjo down to the corner of Queen and Main street and begin to play, while your friends square dance.

44. Walk across street in Beatles/Abbey Road manner.  Remember the shoes.

45. Ask people if they know where you can get a rod of uranium by next Tuesday. When they say no, exclaim, "Well, that's it for the World then."

46. Walk right behind someone. Like, right behind them.

47. Find out how many forward rolls it takes to get from one end of safeway to the other.

48. Play noughts and crosses on the footpath with chalk

49. Make a documentary about the kind of person who takes their family out to dinner at 9:30 at night.

50. Enquire at one of the employment agencies as to how you could become a spy.

51. Go into one of our many law firms and ask a lawyer for Satan's address.

52. Find out how long it takes for a teddy bear to burn

53. See how long you can maintain a wail

54. Pretend to be the Napisan man in Safeway.

55. Play knick-knocking

56. Climb into the freezers at Safeway

57. Tell the teller at the bank that you'll be their friend if they give you some free money. Pout when they say "no"

58. Get up on a soapbox with a bible and a sock puppet - then get ranting.

59. Tackle shoppers in Coles, shouting "LOOK OUT!!!" Then get up and walk away.

60. Strut along street, Reservoir Dogs style.

61. Go through Maccas Drive-Thru with someone in the trunk of the car, banging and shouting, "Let me out!" (Try not to be the trunk-guy.)

62. Ask TXU employees if they're excited by gas and electricity.

63. Ride a bike down the Albert St. Hill

64. Play 'Spot the Cult Member' (With around 3 cults living in or around Warragul, this isn't that hard)

65. Climb to the top of the Arts Centre when they have the spotlight going, and make a bat-signal

66. Exorcise the evil spirits from McDonalds

67. Enjoy the fresh air - heh.

68. Dance a merry jig outside of the Irish pub.  Only it's not an Irish pub anymore, so you have to do a retro kitcsh jig, which isn't nearly as cool.

69. Wonder aloud how you ended up in such a backwater town where it seems like every person who lives there is Cletus the Slack-Jawed Yokel

70. Go bowling on Friday night and see Simon's team in action.

71. Try to compile a list about fun things that you can do in Warragul

72. Walk behind people, filming, saying softly to yourself, "Watch as the predator hunts his prey."

73. Skid down the St. Paul's oval embankment

74. Put a coin in the wishing well. Sorry, wishing that you weren't in Warragul anymore doesn't work.

75. Go to the TAFE restaurant.  Be gentle to the waiters and assist them in their education.

76. Meander through the streets.

77. Meander through the streets, backwards.

78. Go see the Diegesis festival, if it's on. 

79. Sit outside Sanity and let the music wash over you.

80. Organize a protest march through the town

81. Go to a party.

82. Visit 4 Mouritz St. I'm sure they're nice people.

83. Put on Army Fatigues and join the Warragul Vigilantes.  Then go and vigilante.

84. Cowboys and Indians!

85. Does the word 'Macarena' mean anything to you?

86. Go to the St. Paul's grand auction and dummy-bid.

87. Give Smiley stickers to tired check-out chicks

88. Find the perfect egg, ala Clerks

89. Skateboard along the main street

90. Go to the athletics track and do pull-ups on the bars provided

91. Have Mr. Elly Fantastico speak for you.

92. Skip with a skipping rope.

93. Ask the girl at the Newsagents down from the cinema why the sky is blue.

94. Place someone under citizen's arrest

95. Take your boombox and pump out Wiggles.

96. Sing songs from Mary Poppins to the teenyboppers. Namely, Supercalifragalisticexpialadocious and chim-chim-chimeny-chim-chim-cheroo.

97. Pick some flowers from the gardens in the middle of the round-a-bout on Napier St. and give them to the 5th person you see.

98. Put on a beret and don't shave your goatee off and pretend to be a hip beatnik

99. Go collect money for Red Cross.

100. Visit Me!

101. Riverdance.

102. Leave.