Earlier today, the server went offline.
I tried to log on... and.... nothing.
"Holy Fucking Jesus Fucking Christ!" I yelled.
What the fuck is this? Had those ASIO ratfuckers finally shut me down?
I called up my man at ASIO.
"What the fuck is this, man? Did you fuckers shut down my site?"
"That's right, motherfucker! What the fuck is going on?"
"Listen, Cam... we haven't done anything to your site, but you've gotta listen to me, man, there's an open investigation going on that Orville guy, and word is that he's coming back to Australia next month - if you see him, don't let him in you-"
I hung up.
If it wasn't ASIO, who was it?
I called up Eli. It rang twice, and then I hung up.
Wait a second! This was the number I'd used when I was making all those prank phone calls that his family had been kidnapped by Estonian terrorists.
Suddenly, the phone rang.
"Ello?" I said in my best Estonian accent.
"Cam, I know it's you," he replied.
Apparently, the server was under repair.
"It'll be back up in a few hours," he said.
Well, that was cool.
Later, I was speaking to my little sister.
"Dude, guess what."
"We have to wear wide brimmed hats at school, whenever we're outside."
"Really? What about between classes?"
"Whenever we're outside. The principal's got skin cancer."
"That's fucked.... So, did anything else exciting happen?"
"Not that I can think of."
Several minutes pass.
"Oh, a girl in Year 10 took all her exams and put them in four different bins in the Year 10 corridor. Then she set the bins on fire. Then she got expelled. Her parents were supposed to pick her up, but she ran off. One of the teachers went after her, and bumped into the group of Year 10 boys who smoke... smoking... so they all got busted. Anyway, then she eloped with her boyfriend."