Avant garde, no?

Another strange dream... though not quite as out there as the Humphrey Bogart dream which was about as fruity as they've come in the last couple of weeks.

I dreamt that I got drunk, which makes this the second dream in recent times in which I experience an altered state of consciousness within an already quite altered dreamscape - a couple months back I dreamt that I took a bunch of dream-cocaine, with fascinating results.

So, I'm drinking Pasito, which is a non-alcoholic passionfruit softdrink, when it is suddenly revealed that Pasito is actually alcoholic, didn't you know that?

Anyway, I stumble around a bit, and go for a drive, and then I wake up.

Why is this important? Well, obviously I blame myself for my parent's divorce.

Let's not let the small niggling point of their continued marriage spoil my professional psycho-analysis.

Anyway, the actually real actual reason why that it's important, is that today was, by all accounts, a boring day.

On the upside, the work experience kid hung out with the boss all day - I've come to the conclusion that I don't like him - he's far too square.

In other news, (aha! A pun of sorts, as I'm about to make a comment on the news) apparently (stay calm. Are you seated?) somewhere in Amerika, a car crashed into (get this!) a petrol bowser at a gas station.

Okay, now, you'll never guess what happened, but the bowser caught on fire!

SHIT! Not fire! Man's hottest and wiliest foe!

Okay, so there was this other car fueling up, right! Oh no! OH NO! Okay, so the other car caught on fire!

Shit! SHIT! Look out, other car! There's fire afoot!

Luckily, all the people in that car escaped unharmed. And the driver of the crashing car ran away like some sort of fire-causing fugitive.

So... this incident, in which nobody was killed, in the middle of nowhere, in another country... was news how exactly?

Oh, right... Fire pretty.

You'll notice that I have no idea which state this fire happened in. This is because I was yelling at the television screen. Of course I could look it up.... oh, wait... no other news medium has picked up the story, because it is A NON STORY!

A whole bunch of more important shit went down today... it's just fucking irresponsible. I should write to Mediawatch.

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