Having had about 3 hours of sleep and waking up to the cacophony of my phone's alarm (propagandhi), my stereo alarm (David Bowie) and my computer (Les Miserables - I didn't set that up... spooky) I had an inspiration.
If I were to change my surname to 'Free The' and I were to marry multiple wives whose surnames had been changed to the names of the wrongfully imprisoned (like Juliet West Memphis) we could name our children the appropriate number (in this example, Three) and give them a hyphenated surname. One, Freethe-Cambridge.
This plan involves both illegality (bigamy) and arguable immorality (giving a kid a really cruel name) but it seemed like a really good idea at the time.
To be honest, I am beginning to question the sense of the whole endeavour as my soy macchiato takes hold.
(a note to ASIO: I am lying about drinking a macchiato, I don't even know what that is)