Avant garde, no?

So... What happened last weekend?

Let's just look at the statistics:

Drugs taken: 0

I didn't smoke any weed.
I didn't take any speed.
I didn't drink any mead.

Fuck. I'm a poet, and I didn't even know it.

Seriously, no drugs.

Injuries sustained:

1 sprained ankle
1 stubbed thumb
4 shallow cuts to my left hand (accidentally self-inflicted)

Crimes committed:

Driving over double lines.
Littering.
Buying alcohol for teens.
Speeding.
Minor vandalism.
Destruction of property.
Theft of "City Property" - a 'hard rubbish' related bylaw.

Items stolen "from the city":

1 Television set.
2 CD players.
1 Tape deck
1 VCR
1 Turntable.

Arrests: Zero

Police chases on foot: One

Alcohol induced confrontations: Two

Violent alcohol induced confrontations: One

Deaths: Zero

I believe I win, Mr. Weekend.

And that's that!

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