Avant garde, no?

Just when you thought my stellar Blog Interview (or Blinterview) series was over, BAM!, I come outta left field with a right hook of anarchist goodness to the solar plexus.

This will probably be the last in the Blinterview series (unless Tim Blair replies to my email) so we have to go out with a bang.

Who is @ndy? @ndy is this guy I know who is like some sort of crazy anarchist. Man, if there's one thing @ndy likes to do it's a good spot of state-smashing. His other qualities include his piercing stare and his smooth, silky hair. I would wager that approx. 90% of women and 10% of men visibly swoon in his presence. He has a blog called Slackbastard which is quite a fitting name because whenever we meet up for soy lattes or whatever he is always late.

I counteract this tendency towards tardiness by occasionally not showing up at all. On with the Blinterview!


1. Would you say that giving women the vote: A. Did irreparable damage to society / B. Did damage to society that could be rectified by revoking their voting priviledges?

Terrific first questions Doctor, ones that have occupied much of the time I spend thinking. (Which is a lot: at least several hours a week.) And on reflection, I answer with an emphatic 'yes', to both questions. Women don't need votes; au contraire, women need guns, a small (or perhaps large) piece of land containing a house (or houses), with a room of their own, and the contemporary equivalent of approximately £500 a year.

As to what women want, I've no more idea than Uncle Ziggy did.

By the way, are priviledges at all related to potatowedges?

2. People have accused you of being an elaborate hoax perpetrated by persons unknown. Who is your secret alter-ego?

Ha! Trust the Doctor to raise the subject of the infamous trial of 'Persons Unknown' in such a clever and oblique fashion. Given the contemporary climate of paranoia induced by the 'War on Terror', your political instincts are, as ever, acute in the extreme. But for the benefit of persons besides Dr. Cam and myself, 'Persons Unknown' refers, of course, to the trial of six young anarchists in London in 1979 on charges of "conspiracy with persons known and unknown to cause explosions". As one of those accused, Irish filmmaker Ronan Bennett, recalls: "The case was variously dubbed the Persons Unknown trial or the Anarchists trial -- we were all voluble if unsophisticated young enemies of the state, all states. We also had absolutely nothing to do with any explosions. After several months in custody, this charge was dropped and a different conspiracy charge preferred. Opening the Crown's case at the Old Bailey a year later, the prosecutor said we had conspired 'to overthrow society'. The jury acquitted us on all counts."

And my secret alter-ego is

3. If you could pash any Australian newspaper columnist - who would it be and why?

Andrew Bolt, of course. Why? Because he's such a bloody great kisser. (Trust me.)

4. Brad & Angelina - will it last in '07?

Not if I can help it.

5. Would you prefer to be in a position where you did not have the responsibility of making decisions?

Hmmm. Tricky. Q. What's a "decision"?

6. Could you agree to "strict discipline"?

Oh yes. Definitely.

7. Would the idea of making a complete new start cause you much concern?

Not in the least: I'm very familiar with that idea.

8. What are your plans for the development of the solar system in the next fifty years?

STCA, I intend to pave the whole system, put parking stripes on it, and still be home by Christmas 2057.

9. Would you get in the ring and fight me? I mean, actually FIGHT me?

Only if we're both naked, covered in jelly, and surrounded by thousands of spectators. In a word: yes.

10. Could you ever bring yourself to return my affection?

Possibly. Let's see how we go with those books first, 'K?

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