And break your neck or your toe or your cranium.
I think it is time that we examine the news of the day!
-- My Sheets --
My sheets are awesome. They are a mostly white number, but with a bit of a black and white check thing going on at the top... To put it simply, I am *always* the best dressed klansman at the crossburning with this baby.
-- My Cereal --
I like to eat rice bubbles for breakfast. This morning I had cheese on toast. It was pretty good.
-- Advice --
That stuff in the medicine cabinet is not candy.
-- Dreamings --
In slightly disturbing news, I apparently made a brief cameo in the dreamings of Comrade Luke McLukeington. There was also a shark involved. This is the second time that somebody has dreamed about me and sharks.
WOAH-HEY! BREAKING NEWS!
-- Showering --
I do not know how long my shower was this morning, as I actually fell asleep, only waking up when I started to fall over.
-- Birthdays --
There are two things that spin me out. When people who I thought were older are actually younger. And when people I thought were younger are actually older.
For example, there was once this young lady who was a friend of a friend who I met at a party when I was about 18 or something. I assumed she was like 20 or something, but then one day I am at another party, and it turns out she was only 16.
Another example, one of my friends turned TWENTY SEVEN the other day. I'm like, What The Hell? I hadn't really thought about how old they were before, but I didn't think they were a GROWN UP!
For a final example: After meeting people who had read this blog, I'm told that they expected me to be like 30-something. What the fuck?
This concludes our breaking news. We now return to our regular programming...
-- Saturday Morning Cartoons --
I watched Lilo and Stitch this morning. Lilo and Stitch had to defeat this pollution monster that was terrorising the island they lived on.
This pollution monster was spraying pollution everywhere!
Luckily, they managed to defeat the pollution monster with the natural enemy of all pollution: Air freshening aerosol cans.